She was on my shuttle from the airport to the conference, along with two other women, and hey, we were hungry. We asked the driver to stop for fast food before we reached the seminary, because dinner was still hours away. Well, the others asked, and since I am from the “eat now because you never know when food will be available again” school of pregnancy, I happily concurred.
I’m sure the woman is fascinating, but part of me just wanted to leave the poor dear alone. I wonder if she gets tired of explaining how to pronounce her lovely but unusual name. Does she enjoy hearing stories about how her father held a group of 9-year-olds rapt during one of his speeches? Or how a congregation uses his words as a benediction each week, reciting them by heart? Or does she just get tired of it? When someone turned to her, incredulous, and said “You’re Bishop Tutu’s daughter?” she said wryly (or was it wearily?), “That’s what my mother tells me.”
But there’s more to this conference than minor celebrity. I’m having a great time. The seminary campus is peaceful and the nights are cool. I have the smallest room I have ever seen. It’s the width of a twin bed and not quite double the length, with a sink at one end and a bathroom down the hall. But hey, I have a window and a plug for dialing in, and how much space does one person really need? All I’m saying is, this is not the room that Uncle Walt gets when he comes to present here.
There are roundtable leaders, who are pastors like me, and there are workshop leaders, who run the gamut, and there are seminar leaders, who are mostly seminary professors. Although I’m here to help young people discern their call, connecting with the profs is a piece of the discernment puzzle for me as well—do I want to be one of you? Am I called to be? Could I be? Should I be? Some of them are lovely, and they all seem interesting, but academics are also frequently tedious and insufferable. Then again, so am I. Then again again, so are many pastors I know.
My roundtable group of prospective pastors (I’m sure none of them will be tedious and insufferable!) consists of nine young women who make me wonder what the heck I was doing with my life in my early 20s. Is this crop of young motivated world-changers an encouraging sign for the future, or are they on the fast-track to burnout? Time will tell; my job is to hold space for them while they get pushed, pulled, folded and spindled over the next few days.
Our limo driver insisted on telling us his faith story. (Goes with the territory.) He was an agnostic until the age of 43, always holding out for a burning bush. Finally, through a series of life events, he came to put his trust in God. He remembers the moment when he made the decision, when he asked God to come into his life while driving in his car. It was a drizzly morning and the sun was still low, and within minutes of his confession, he was literally surrounded by a rainbow, so close he could reach out his window and touch it. For him it was a burning bush, but it came afterward. Who am I to say?
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Asides
» I have been remiss in posting SBJ’s latest stats: 23 pounds and 27 inches at six months. Yes, I’ve got the big mama biceps.
» Aaaaaand little she-who-is lost another tooth this week!
» SBJ is four months old, 19 pounds 5 ounces, and 26 inches tall. GIGANTOR!
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This sounds like a really cool experience/conference. You’re right about the rainbow. This also sounds like a pretty prestigious thing to be involved with - Congrats!
I love the rainbow story. What a marker for that man to always have.
Glad the trip is going well and that the room is wired so that you can communicate. I can’t wait to hear more about this interesting experience. Is God calling more women than men into ministry these days? It seems like it. Or has the church as an institution lost so much perceived “power” in society that males are less open to hearing their call?
I don’t know about prestige!–Bishop Tutu’s daughter does add some cache, but really it’s a bunch of pastors and professors (of which she is one).
c’sgmom, that is exactly what I’ve been wondering today. Granted there are plenty of young men here (I just happened to be blessed with an all-woman group), but 60-65% of the fellows are women. And I do wonder whether the prestige of the clergy went down in part when women started getting involved (and as a result, people started thinking about ministry as a helping profession like teaching or nursing), or whether women felt more comfortable getting involved when ministry stopped being about being a civic leader in the community (if it ever really was in the first place).
Of course, I’m coloring with the broad-tipped markers here, so don’t go too far with it.
there is this study i heard about when working on the issue of “recruiting” for the vocation of pastor that indeed points to the prestige issue as i call it - when women began entering ministry then men saw it as less prestigous so therefore it is not as attractive to them. i wonder if ministry is not as attractive to them or if the paycheck is not as attractive? i once knew a young man who would have been an amazing elementary school teacher yet he chose to do something else because he could not support his family on that income….
then, having been invited (as a clergyperson) to be a “civic leader” in this interfaith dialogue discussion, i wonder what we have lost when most people think clergy are the last people that should ever be involved in civic issues.
So is discerning a call to ministry as modern as marrying for love? Elinor Dashwood’s love interest in Austen’s Sense and Sensibility really wanted to be a parson, but most of the other clergy characters in the novels of 200 years ago seem like they went into clericals because one brother did politics, another the military and one the Church, or something like that.
If men, then, are choosing away from ministry because it lacks prestige, does that tell us that many who were ministers in the past shouldn’t have been there in the first place, that they were seeking prestige rather than heeding a call?
Intriguing…
I think it’s pretty much mandatory for cabbies and limo drivers to have faith stories to share with any clergy in said vehicle. At least it’s been my experience.
Here’s another theory from an armchair sociologist…
Although women are obviously common in the workplace, theirs is still sometimes implicitly considered the “supplemental income” within the married couple. So a lower-paying job is not a big deal. The husband is still considered the primary provider.
Maybe? Again I’m WAY generalizing, and certain areas of the country might display this mindset more than others.
One thing I don’t hear from a lot of young women is that ministry is, actually, a pretty family-friendly job. Yes, your phone can ring at any time (although my church really respects boundaries), and emergencies can trump other things, but by and large, a pastor is almost never going to *have* to miss a soccer game, doctor appointment, or teacher conference. That would make ministry attractive to parents of all stripes, I would think.
Of course that varies by position and by church.
This would explain why I am nearly always financially anxious, given that I am not the supplemental income but instead the one worrying over earning enough to pay the 20% of everything not covered by the denominational health insurance. Maybe I should have gone into real estate after all?
Hugs to Songbird.
If it helps, this conference is at a UCC seminary in the midwest, and it’s lovely, and everytime I see a “God is still speaking” poster I can’t help but send good vibes your way!
Thanks! Hugs and vibes are all appreciated.
I’m envious that you are “away” and thinking deep thoughts with colleagues. I’m at home considering going to the grocery store and listening to the clothes dryer whirl.
Blessings to you in your travels.
Did I mention to you that Uncle Walt heard me speak once and complimented me on what I had to say and that I was an effective speaker? I may have not mentioned this before now in the blogsphere but my pals here in the Pine Grove have heard the story 200 times each. I try to work it into EVERY conversation because as he was speaking to me I went into shock.
Wow St. Cass! You go girl! I hope to get to hear you one of these days. If your writing is any indication, I’d say he’s right on with the assessment.
In the M.Div. program, Uncle Walt definitely had his Entourage of Sycophants, and I was never in that group. I took one of his classes and enjoyed it greatly, and I admire his ability to write, what, a book a week? But am a KO’C partisan all the way. That woman Kicks Butt for Jesus.
It’s interesting that you mentioned the status aspect of men/women going into the ministry. I wonder if people had this discussion when teaching became open to women.
I went to a workshop for K-fifth grade math teachers all last week. I was struck by the fact that 100% of the participants in the course were female. (The course was taught by a man, a middle school math teacher, with a very nurturing teaching style.) While I think it’s great that so many female teachers were dedicated enough to math (many elem. teachers feel more comfortable teaching reading/writing) to spend a whole week out of their summer learning more about it, I thought about the lack of men in elementary schools.
I read in my local newspaper yesterday that our state legislature (wryly labled by a native writer as “The Lege”) was going to put more money toward teacher’s salaries. The state minimum for begiing teachers will become a whopping $24,000, up from $21,000. Many districts contribute more money toward beginning salaries (my district’s is about $34,000) which is great, but those who have been teaching longer don’t make much more than beginning teachers.
All that to say this: it’s a shame that some professions are seen as “women’s professions,” translating to a lower status in our society and a lower salary to go with it.
I was thinking about our president’s No Child Left Behind act (you can’t see me gagging right now.) We pay lip service to the importance of children in our society and the role education has in shaping our country’s future, but will be spending $200 billion dollars on education in the next two years?
(Confession: I’m reading Maureen Dowd’s book, Bushworld, a compilation of her NY Times columns on familia de la Bushie, so I’m all fired up about the inequities in our society and the way our country chooses to spend our wealth.)
Can’t figure out how to edit my previous comment, but it’s “beginning” in that third paragraph, not something that resembles Bejing.
Ooh, Reverend Mother, I was supposed to be at that conference this week (I was a fellow from last year, so would be returning), but instead I’m in the midst of that dreaded three-letter experience, CPE. I loved the conference last year — it really fired me up to start div school — and am hoping they’ll let me come next summer since I had to sit this one out. If we’re both there next year, look me up! (Also, congratulations on your recent good news!!)