Sun-shaft on the floor:
“Can I splash in the puddle?”
We nod, and she jumps.
That happened this morning.
Incidentally…
I’ve been writing stuff down since I could write stuff down. And I always enjoyed learning about and writing haiku, even in elementary school.
Does anyone else remember the cinquain? It seems kind of the black sheep of poetic forms. I remember learning haiku as a child and thinking, “This is a beautiful form, ancient and simple,” and learning cinquain with its 2-4-6-8-2 syllabic scheme and having little patience for it. I recall having a clear sense that nobody really writes this way except at a desk, in a classroom, printing on tablets with upper and lower guide-lines and a dashed line through the middle.
8 Responses to “mom-ku”
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Asides
» I have been remiss in posting SBJ’s latest stats: 23 pounds and 27 inches at six months. Yes, I’ve got the big mama biceps.
» Aaaaaand little she-who-is lost another tooth this week!
» SBJ is four months old, 19 pounds 5 ounces, and 26 inches tall. GIGANTOR!

Writing poetry on those tablets is good for those of us who also need to learn scales instead of just sitting down to improv at the piano.
I like your mom-ku.
If I wrote one today, it would be more like this:
Today show bomb news
Nosebleed son comes rushing in
day turned upside down
I love Carl Sandburg, but not his Cinquains, hence the following:
Cinquain:
Sandburg
And my Rev-Ku for the day would be…
Low, gentle roaring,
The window unit struggles,
sweat stifles sermon.
Sadly, my teacher colleagues think cinquain is just dandy. With any of the formula poems, you don’t really have to teach writing - just tell ‘em what to plug in and where and you have instant poetry.
Oh, and C should *definitely* be with the young threes. Heck, she probably already knows more than they do !
We studied cinquain in a “Creative Writing” unit in high school. Did not leave the same positive feelings as Haiku or Tanka (add two more lines of 7 syllables each).
Similar is the Octologue (3/5/3/3/5/3/3/3), which is supposed to be a sort of brief Dramatic Monologue.
I’ve also enjoyed Jack Kerouac’s “American Haiku”, which aims for the same succinctness and focus on image, but does not worry as much about syllable count.
Cinquain
#1
sun beams
shine through the glass
makes dust dance like fairies
laughing and floating up into
my fan
#2
black hands
on a white face
endless sorrowful dance
conflict and pain, no joy until
five’s struck
#3
His trunk,
full of hard shit.
American nightmare
on the job, with his “attorney”
blows minds.
Octologue
#1
sunshine dream
waves of light pour out
jump up and
soak in the
rebirth of Phoenix.
cindered souls
open and
spring forth life.
#2
Sallyann,
bane of my work life.
Always gripes
makes work suck.
Old fuddy-duddy.
Old as time
bleeds the sand
of Pharaohs.
#3
When all fails
and life seems too hard
do not quit
do not stop
keep on, keeping on
take your bat
drive it home
win the game
That was kinda fun.
even your prose is poetry:
no one ever writes this way
except at a desk,
in a classroom,
printing on tablets
with upper and lower guidelines
and a dashed line
through the middle.
or perhaps
…
with upper—
and a dashed line through the middle- - -
and lower guidelines.—