Our weekend
We had a wonderful weekend. Saturday we went to the National Arboretum which is amazing and huge. Sunday I actually did yardwork! And enjoyed it! That’s how nice the weather has been.
We have hit upon a very nice rhythm to the weekend:
-Friday night is family night. We will often eat something quick and easy while curling up with a movie. I think some people do family night as a time to turn off the TV, but
a) we don’t watch much TV to begin with, and
b) C and M are a little young for Clue.
-Saturday is running around/errand/outing day. The farmer’s markets open soon, so I think we’ll divide and conquer most mornings—M and I at the grocery store, R and C at the farmer’s market/bakery.
-Sunday is church day, with Mamala coming over around 4 to be with the girls. This allows R and me to do some chores that are tough to manage while juggling kids. Then he and I go out to dinner. Good stuff. I am preaching this Saturday night and Sunday morning, so we’ll see how blown-to-bits that schedule gets with sermon-writing thrown in.
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Churchy bits
Yesterday was Children’s Sunday, which means the children led worship and presented their spring musical in lieu of the sermon. Senior Pastor always takes the opportunity to go away for the weekend. (Likewise, I’ll take Youth Sunday off this year, which is Mother’s Day—maybe I’ll actually get breakfast in bed! A rare thing for a clergymom I would guess, unless the breakfast is at oh-dark-thirty.)
Well, Senior Pastor *basically* took the weekend off, although she called early Sunday morning to make sure I was planning to robe up and welcome the congregation before turning things over to the children.
First, I was a little ticked: I have been here almost three years and have attended Children’s Sunday every year—I know the drill. Does she not trust me?
Then I realized: Wait a minute. She is calling early on Sunday morning of her weekend away to tend to work matters—and not even life-or-death work matters, but a truly minor detail.
Third, I resolved: Don’t ever get so heavily invested in the church—any church—that you interrupt vacation to check up on a colleague regarding a minor detail.
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Another work-related tidbit—I received an inquiry from a church: “We were given your name by so-and-so; please consider applying to be our pastor.” This is my first real inquiry; I received a couple of nibbles after preaching at Mondo Youth Conference two years ago, but this was an actual letter with Church Information Form attached. (I also know who put my name in, although two other people connected with the church also urged me to apply.)
It’s strange to be entering the time frame in which many associate pastors start looking around. Three years is on the early side to be looking, but certainly not unheard of. Five years is almost an eternity for associates. As much as we affirm that associate pastors are not junior pastors—that associate pastor is as full a calling as solo pastor or head of staff—it is still a place for apprentice work to happen, and once that work is completed, the person is “launched” to a solo or head of staff position.
Anyway, I realized how easy it is to lose sight of one’s true goals in favor of feeding the ego. It’s a great church. Theologically and spiritually, I think we’d be a great match. I’m not sure I am quite qualified to be their pastor, but I could grow into it, and it’s flattering to be recommended. So I gave it a little bit of thought, and might have easily thrown my hat in the ring.
Then I remembered the 3/4 time thing, and the writing thing, and the fact that Mamala lives here and it has been soooo great to have a grandparent nearby for the sake of the kids (this church is in the same city as Crusty-old Theological Seminary, where I went). And I read the church’s information form, and didn’t feel that nudge that you feel when it’s an opportunity you’re supposed to pursue. So, there you go.
This is a leap of faith for me—ChaplainMom and I have talked about this—the compulsion to say yes to opportunities for fear that if you say no, that the opportunities will start to dry up. It takes a degree of trust to say no.
(Incidentally, thanks to everyone for the thoughts about committee structures. I talked to the elder in question over the weekend and I think we’re going to give it a go. The current committee will become the Sunday School team and meet every other month or so. Then we will create task groups for retreats and special events. We’ll see what happens.)
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Life and death
This weekend I read a personal reflection in the New Yorker with the subtitle:
Irene Raeburn, born December 28, 2004, died December 24, 2004.
Yes, you read that right. It was excruciating.
R does not get why I would read such an article. I read it because it was extremely well written and poignant, and true in this very deep way that something is true though I have not experienced the thing being written about. I don’t know. For me the reminder of death is what makes life so precious and lovely. Is this true for other people too, or is this a product of having my dad die two weeks before my first child was born?
At any rate, my peering into the abyss does have its limits:
There is no way I can see United 93.
I. Just. Can’t.
How about you?
17 Responses to “this and that”
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Asides
» I have been remiss in posting SBJ’s latest stats: 23 pounds and 27 inches at six months. Yes, I’ve got the big mama biceps.
» Aaaaaand little she-who-is lost another tooth this week!
» SBJ is four months old, 19 pounds 5 ounces, and 26 inches tall. GIGANTOR!
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This is true confession time. I wasn’t going to tell anyone, but after our trip to see beautiful azaleas on Saturday I was so mellowed out that I just had to rev up the engine again so I went to see United 93.
I had spent alot of time reading reviews and listening to the writer/director talk about the movie so I felt like I was prepared for it. I’ll have to say that I was a little nervous at first, but after getting into the movie, I was really glad that I went. I think it was very well done and since we all know the story, it wasn’t as stressful as I thought it would be. It did take me back to that day, but my concentration then was more on the people in the Twin Towers than those poor souls dying in PA.
I think the eeriest part of the movie for me was at the end when the terrorists were reciting their Islamic prayers, knowing they were going to die, and at the same time some of the passengers were reciting The Lord’s Prayer.
All I could think of then, as I do now, was that piece in The Onion soon after September 11th.
That whole issue of the Onion was Pulitzer Prize-worthy. Also loved “Hijackers Surprised to Find Selves in Hell,” and the oddly prescient “U.S. Vows to Defeat Whoever It Is We’re at War With.” The whole issue is here.
The movie currently has a rating of 93% (a suspicious coincidence, but whatever) at Rotten Tomatoes, and I’m so torn, because if it were a bad movie, it wouldn’t be a big deal, but it’s supposed to be well done… but I just can’t do it.
I go to the movies to enjoy myself and escape the harsh realities of the world. My personal feeling is that someone’s tragedy should never be turned into entertainment. That’s why I don’t watch crime shows on TV, either.
I like cartoons. I’m gonna go see “The Wild” and “Over the Hedge” this month. Woohoo.
XT
I’m trying to understand how a person was born four days *after* they died.
I’m tempted to see United 93.
I dont know the story Jonah but I suspect the baby did in uterus and was delivered 4 days later. In the UK at least the thought is that it’s better for the mother to go through labour than perform a c section. I think it’d be heartbreaking
As for United 93. I won’t go to see it. I think it’s too soon to have made this film. and that’s from a european perspective.
Lorna, that is correct.
The baby was full term as well… [shudder]
Like Xpat. Texan, I go to the movies for escape. I’m positive that I would find the movie to be heartening, moving and maybe even triumphant.
I’m still not going to see it. Maybe later. But probably not.
I found the movie, United 93, very empowering and that’s something I need to remember for myself. I’m very glad I saw it! It’s made me stronger.
I won’t see it because no matter how good or true it is, the mix of 9-11 and Hollywood turns my stomach.
I had to read your post several times before fully understanding the d. before b. bit — but I understand your reading it. About three months after my son was born, I stumbled upon a blog written by a woman whose daughter died within hours of being born. She was born about the time that my son was and they used the name that we would have had BB been a girl. I couldn’t stop reading, and paged through her entire blog. I was greatly impacted and noticeably shaken.
On another note — your statement about feeling that little nudge about another call hit right on today — I’m deliberating about knowing when it’s time to leave an associate call and driving myself a bit silly with wonderings.
I am so with Keith. I have a problem with taking a small piece of information and making it into something it isn’t. For myself I lived through that day to close to what was actually happening (I live in Jersey City and work in Newark.) I remeber getting the phone calls from extended family making sure I was alright and that we all gotten home safely. You have to leave the wound alone for the scab to heal. I’m not saying we should forget all that happened, but we need to put it behind us and move on. Considering that this is the 5 year anniversary, you know its going to be all over the place for the next few months. Did anyone realize that the 11th anniversary of the Oklahoma bombing was within the past 2 weeks. I heard a possible 10 second spot on the local radio news, nothing on television. Why isn’t that garnering a rally cry of “Never Forget”? I alos don’t agree with war movies, no matter what the war (WWI, WWII, Korea, Vietnam) - although 1776 was a great musical, I kind of carve that out of war movies. Movies are about escapism. If I want reality, I just sit onthe front porch.
Beth
I think I will see it…but not in the theatre probably…too much to process in that public setting…though I imagine seeing it with a room full of people…more people than were actually on that plane probably…would have a special kind of power.
Acknowledging that many turn away because of the hollywood + 9/11 = distasteful equation, I wonder too if the reaction of some to the movie has something to do with our cultural refusal to deal with death as a fact of life (even unnatural death).
I’m working on a reflection about the fact that in the last 5 months, I’ve buried almost 10 percent of my congregation…each a very different death…each very much the same…and I’m finding myself reading my notes about Isaiah class which I had with Super Famous Scholar at Crusty-Old Theological Seminary during the months after 9/11…and I still think we don’t lament well, we don’t deal well with death…though articles like the New Yorker one you reference is a sign we might be moving in a healthy direction…
I’m with you Chicago Rev. We don’t do death well. Even as Christians. Especially unexpected and UNFAIR death.
I’m not sure what the answer is though. If there is one.
Oh, that piece in the New Yorker was so lovely and poignant. It was excruciating, as you say, but so well done. I was so grateful to him for writing it, as it gave me an insight that I hadn’t had into a life that seems unimaginable to me, a life after the loss of a child.
As for United 93, I’m weirdly tempted by it, only because the reviews are so good. But not yet, not yet.
I contend that there is no sadder place than a delivery room where the only cries heard are those coming from adults.
I referenced this post over at my place…
I think it’s one thing to make a movie like Schindler’s List or Titanic that shows terrible, yet historic and important events. It’s another to capitalize on events that are still unfolding in their aftermath on the evening news. We’re still involved in a war fighting (or so we’re told) the same people that hijacked the four planes. I just this week read an interview with the mother of one of the people on that flight, and how she’s coping with his death. Firefighters are still dying from all the dust they inhaled that day. Now someone has gone and made fifteen million dollars telling their story. I just think it’s in bad taste.
While I was writing this, I just found out that World Trade Center by Oliver Stone will be coming out this fall. I fear that will be in even worse taste.